You Raise Me Up

Dear Micah and Liam -

When your dad and I were married six years ago, we danced with our parents (me with Pop-Pop, he with Grandma) to Josh Groban's song, "You Raise Me Up". It's such a beautiful song and was so fitting to play as a small thank you to our parents for all that they did to prepare us for one another.

A couple of days ago, I was on the way home from somewhere and had the two of you in the back of the car. Liam was fairly quiet, only speaking up to babble every once in a while. Micah had been pretty silent until this song came on the radio.

When it did, I selfishly wanted to have a moment. I wanted to remember dancing my father, all the feelings of marrying yours, and just feeling like all was right with the world.

I didn't get my moment. Micah, you picked that time to ask all kinds of questions about all different kinds of things. And I started to get frustrated, thinking why couldn't you just stop talking for a few minutes so that I could enjoy the song and live in my memories.

And then it hit me and I had to laugh at myself. I was so busy trying to live in my old memories that I was failing at creating new memories for you. As wonderful as our wedding was, it's over. The symbolism isn't and the beauty of it lingers, but the memory of the day wasn't nearly as important as the memory I was creating with you. Paying attention to you and focusing on you was more important than focusing on me.

Thanks for reminding me to live in the moment, and teaching me once again to live in the moment.

You raise me up so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up to more than I can be.

Love,

Mommy